WFL Weekly 5 - Week 5: The Bugs

Papa Jack Media · Oct. 5

THIS IS A CODE RED TO ALL WFL MANAGERS. I REPEAT. THIS IS A CODE RED TO ALL WFL MANAGERS. A VERY VIRAL AND SERIOUS PANDEMIC HAS INFECTED THE WFL. LEAD DOCTORS & EXPERTS AT WFL HEADQUARTERS HAVE DECLARED A STATE OF EMERGENCY FOR THE LEAGUE. STAY CLEAR OF THE BIGGEST THREAT TO YOUR TEAMS: THE INJURY BUG.

 

Well with that report, we here at WFL Weekly promise to provide you with any and all updates regarding the Injury Bug Pandemic as we receive them. It has been revealed that the Injury Bug is a highly contagious virus that first appears in one player, and quickly spreads to others on the roster, rendering them completely unable to compete for weeks if not months on end. Some serious cases have led to players missing the whole season. The fent folding team facility has seen the most severe of cases thus far, with Ceedee Lamb and Mike Evans passing the Injury Bug to Lamar Jackson as well. Elsewhere, Cumming… is just beginning to work its way through an Injury Bug that passed through their team, as James Conner, Austin Ekeler, and Ricky Pearsall have all been hit hard. Fuhuluhtoogans has also been a team that has been hit hard by the Injury Bug, watching Joe Burrow & Jayden Reed pass the virus to Tyreek Hill as well. The most recent case developing sees Bucky Irving and Trey Benson from Marvin's Room as the team’s first documented cases.

 

As you can see, the Injury Bug is a serious threat to our league, and we advise you to follow the WFL’s guidelines and do your best to protect your players from this horrible virus. Stay tuned for more updates.

 

Without further ado, let’s rock n roll

 

Biggest Winner:

Rico Suave (Johnny) - Johnny came into Week 4 knowing that he had to give the league leader his hardest punch in a prime opportunity, and when the lights were brightest it was Andy fent folding and lying on the canvas. One of the most storied rivalries in the league, the Agudelo Bowl has seen its share of absolute barn burners and clunkers alike. This may have fallen short of high scoring expectations, but the result is arguably one of the most important. The WFL will not have a winless team this season despite a wide belief from other GMs that this would be the case. Just like a journeyman QB, Rico Suave has taken their lumps and seen faces come and go, but they’ve gotten better as the fight has gone on, and feel like they might just be rounding into form. A huge battle with Cumming… this week will decide the occupant of the WFL’s basement in what should be a truly entertaining bout if nothing else.

 

 

Other Winners:

The Bang Bros (Andres) - Flip a coin on this Bang Bros team every week, and hope to God luck falls your way if you’re playing them. Last week, the Final Boss Bang Bros showed up, scoring a league high on the season, 187.4 points, which was enough to take down a high flying Rome wasn’t built in a day. In four weeks, The Bang Bros have scored 163.9, 105, 126.8, and now 187.4. To say that’s a bit of a discrepancy would be an understatement. Andres is watching his WR trio of terror absolutely firing on all cylinders, as Amon Ra St. Brown, Drake London, and Emeka Egbuka all scored 20+ points in what was a huge win for The Bang Bros Brand. What do we expect this week against Worse than WHL and Jeremias? Your guess is as good as ours.

 

Fans of overall WFL competitiveness - Week 4 saw the last of the WFL's winless and undefeated each add a number in the other column, proving that the WFL truly is one of the most competitive leagues in sports. This season has proven what we already knew: On any given Sunday (or Monday)(or Thursday too I guess), anything can happen in the WFL. Here’s to watching more madness in the best league in all of fantasy sports.

 

Biggest Loser:

Hall of Fame Youtuber (Fabian) - Just 2 weeks ago, Hall of Fame Youtuber was 2-0 and looking like an agonizingly formidable foe yet again for WFL GMs. Those 2 weeks probably feel like forever ago to Fab now. Things were already taking a downturn in the points scoring department for Fab’s squad, but the season ending injury to Malik’s Nabers has dealt this team a painful blow that it might not be able to recover from. For a GM that tends not to trade too often, perhaps more deals are on the way to try and fix this roster. Hall of Fame Youtuber sure could use some fantasy football advice right now.

 

Other Losers:

fent folding (Andy) - You can often tell how a team is doing by the amount of name changes they have, and Andy’s team underwent at least two from last week to this one. The previously undefeated Commissioner suffered not only from multiple injuries, but also a humiliating defeat in this year’s Agudelo Bowl. Putting up a paltry 94 points against Big Bro is not what we’re used to from an Andy-led team, who will have to brave the storm in a tough matchup against Parker this week. A loss might cause some to ask questions about just how legitimate of a threat this team is going forward.

 

Donuts! (Sponsored by Tough Cookie Inc.):

It’s been a little bit of a rough go of it recently for donut production here at the WFL Bakery. At the very least we haven’t had any donuts for the donut section, as our very own WFL Commissioner provided us with the order for one delectable pastry this week.

 

🍩 Isaiah Likely (fent folding) - Not a lot went right for Andy and his previously undefeated squad last week. In addition to more injuries, he got a big fat goose egg in his TE spot. Mister Commissioner Likely should’ve started someone else, and Likely should make sure he's prepared for big news rumored to drop this week…

 

 

Ale’s Trade to Trade Analysis:

*Powered by WussiesGPT*

 

Missing in action this week ☹️

 

THE WFL HIERARCHY

*Proudly sponsored by Tough Cookie Inc. & written by Drew*

 

Welcome to a new installment in WFL Weekly, THE HIERARCHY. We’ll be sifting through every trade, injury, and boneheaded move to provide the very best power rankings each and every week. Fantasy football is largely a game of luck, so we’re here to cut through all the variance. We’ll separate the contenders from the pretenders, identify managers skyrocketing up the ranks, and call out the ones coasting on borrowed time. Does your team have what it takes to sit atop The Hierarchy?

 

We are proud to be sponsored by Tough Cookie Inc.’s NEW Crack, Don’t Crumble Series! Don’t forget to check-in every week, we’ll be rolling out new items throughout the season.

 

Featured Cookie of the Week: I ❤️ Oatmeal Raisin

 

  1. 1. Rome Wasn’t Built in a Day (Parker)

Parker finds himself in unfamiliar territory this season, having one of the most dominant rosters despite being an unlucky 2-2. Bijan Robinson, James Cook, and Puka Nacua are anchor this roster, with 2nd season breakout Rome Odunze adding more fuel to the fire. He has the firepower to win every matchup, but we worry about his depth as bye weeks and injuries start to pile up…

 

  1. 2. Wake and Baker Co. (Jonah)

As group leader of the Wussies, it’s only fitting that Jonah cracks the top 3 in our inaugural WFL Hierarchy. Jonah’s roster seems to be the antithesis of Parker’s. This team is extremely deep but still has fire power in the form of Jahmyr Gibbs & Garrett Wilson, a perfect balance that we have seen lead to fantasy success in the past. This team likely won’t dazzle you, but it will overwhelm you at every roster slot. We think Wake and Baker Co. is set up well for a playoff bid, but we wouldn’t be surprised to see him cash in on another star player.

 

  1. 3. I ❤️ Ohio (Alejandro)

Owner of WussiesGPT, former WFL Champion, and known Dr. Bob enjoyer, Alejandro finds himself “on the podium” after an up-and-down start to the season. Ale has built a solid roster with a pair of anchor RBs in Kyren and Omarion, paired with an extremely good WR core of JJetas, Worthy, and Pickens. He’s also got solid depth with Olave and Stevenson, but we worry that this team will fade as the season goes on. Pickens and Worthy will both likely see their roles diminish as CeeDee and Rashee “Fried” Rice return from injury/suspension, but for now Alejandro is riding high. Jonah.

 

  1. 4. Marvin’s Room (Jack)

This team… man. Talk about underperforming. Jack has all the pieces in place to yet again be a dominant force in the WFL and we’d have him a spot or two higher if not for current struggles of longtime Mud Brother Derick Henry and Mazda Marv coupled with a few ill-timed injuries to Bucky Irving and Trey Benson. He’s got a stud WR in JSN that will likely challenge for the league lead in targets, and Fat Deebo has held things together fairly well thus far through the struggles. The addition of Jayden Daniels this week should bring a much needed morale boost and we expect this team to start making a turnaround soon.

 

  1. 5. KRAFT YAC & CHEESE (Drew)

We’d like to think that before every weekly matchup, Drew sits his players from KRAFT YAC & CHEESE in front a TV, and they just watch the "I WOKE UP FEELIN THE CHEESIEST COACH" Cheez-It commercial over and over again. This potentially concerning fact aside, Drew’s squad definitely have been doing something right, as they sit firmly at the top of the WFL sporting a Top 3 Points For scoring offense. The catalysts of this offensive explosion have been none other than team captain Tucker Kraft, Jaylen Warren, De'Von Achane, and Jalen Hurts to Watch, just to name a few. Just how far can this team fly? Will AJ Brown ever return to former glory? The pieces are here to KRAFT blueprints for a deep run, they just have to settle in and hope they YAC when the lights are the brightest. At the very least, they’ll always have some check down CHEESE to Achane to fall back on.

*written by Jack*

 

  1. 6. Worse than WHL (Jeremias)

As they say, “There’s nothing wrong with him, he’s just dumb”. And there is absolutely nothing wrong with Worse than WHL, it just seems that real-life NFL coaches have a personal vendetta against Jeremias in fantasy, which makes this WR room… yikes. The bright spot for Jeremias is obviously his RB depth, as JT is having a resurgent year under Indiana Jones and CMC is harnessing the life force of every other 49ers player to stay healthy. Pair that with a young rising player like Judkins and CTE enthusiast Cam Skattebo, and you have the best RB room in the league. If good health continues and some NFL teams make good real-life decisions (Bengals trade for Jameis, Steelers banish Arthur Smith, and Jaguars give BTJ hand replacement surgery), then we could see Jere move up a few spots.

 

  1. 7. The Bang Bros (Andres)

If The Bang Bros and Worse than WHL had a baby it would be the greatest WFL team in history. That is to say Andres has the complete OPPOSITE problem to Jeremias and that’s the fact that his RB room has been absolutely putrid this season. Treyveon Henderson and RJ Harvey have been the biggest let-downs of this rookie RB class and there aren’t many other options that Andres can turn to. Fortunately, all-time Wussies nickname legends Amon Jah, Egg on my Buka, and Kendrick American make up probably the best WR room in the league this year. And of course Josh Allen doesn’t hurt either. Andres is going to need a serious bounce-back from those rookie RBs, or we could see him sitting around the middle of the hierarchy most of the season.

 

  1. 8. fent folding (Andy)

This is a team that would probably be higher on this list, but Andy seems to have unfortunately squandered all the advantage given to him by his extra draft picks in what can only be described as the longest duration crash-out in WFL history. Early-season injuries to Lamar, CeeDee, and Mike Evans bump him down a few pegs, and the mega-deal with Eric and Jeremias is clearly not going his way thus far. When his team starts getting healthy we’ll probably see him move up the Hierarchy, but blowing all your FAAB and then starting Darius Slayton is generally not the position you want to be in.

 

9. Fuhuluhtoogens (Eric)

Just when we thought there weren’t any more possible ways that the Dolphins could let Eric down, Tyreek Hill suffered one of the more gruesome injuries in recent memory. And that’s really been the story for Fuhuluhtoogens thus far, as an injury-riddled start to the season which included Joe Burrow and Jayden Reed. The effectively destroyed not only Burrow’s value, but 1st overall selection Jamarr Chase’s as well, which leaves this team relying on young stars TMac and Ashton Jeanty. We think Eric has done well to manage his team through adversity thus far, and things could continue looking up as his rookies gain more footing in the NFL.

 

  1. 10. Hall of Fame YouTuber (Fabian)

As we do every week, we here at WFL Weekly wish you good luck with injuries and leave the rest up to the higher powers. The irony for Fabian is he IS one of those higher powers and yet couldn’t save his own team. After strategically placing Travis Kelce to take out Xavier Worthy in Week 1 to ensure he wouldn’t be available in Week 3 for his matchup against I ❤️ Ohio, it seems karmic retribution is finally catching up to this team. An incredibly unfortunate injury to Malik Nabers sends Fabian cratering down the ranks. Paired with underperformance from supposed two-way superstar Travis Hunter and Chase Brown, Fabian finds himself with an uphill climb if he’s going to make the playoffs.

 

  1. 11. Rico Suave (Johnny)

No manager has the potential to make as wild swings up and down the Hierarchy as Trade2Trade Man himself. Unfortunately, he finds himself down near the bottom after a series of trades that seem to have left him right back where he started. Time is a flat circle. We thought his team was really looking up after the acquisition of Javonte Williams and a bounce-back performance by Omarion Hampton following a disappointing few weeks to start the season. Johnny decided to trade his star power for depth, and we don’t necessarily blame him in this wild world of injuries. It’ll all depend on how these newly acquired players shake out, as well as Rashee Rice’s performance upon return, but for now he finds himself near the bottom of the hierarchy.

 

  1. 12. Cumming… (Daniel)

A victim of his own actions, we find Daniel at the bottom of the WFL hierarchy. He flew too close to the sun and got burned, mortgaging too much draft capital in hopes of a WFL championship last season. Unfortunately, the fantasy gods continue to smite him as punishment for his wrongdoings by taking away both James Conner and Austin Ekeler for the season. But that doesn’t mean the Peach is down and out. Strategic waiver pickups in Woody Marks and Justin Fields could see this scrappy team start to make a turn around. We don’t see this team moving up too high in the power rankings, but that doesn’t mean a few close wins can’t change his fortune in the WFL standings.

 

 

Papa’s Picks:

 

WFL Weekly Game of the Week: Rico Suave (Johnny) vs. Cumming… (Daniel)

  • What was once dubbed 'The Stoppable Force vs. The Movable Object', this weekend’s matchup between the two occupants of the WFL’s basement has far more intrigue than it arguably should be. Despite the self-inflicted hardships that both GMs have burdened themselves with this season. Both beat the winless allegations, and are now battling it out to incredibly move into playoff contention. The job that each has done to make their teams at least competitive is definitely impressive, and they should receive their flowers for that feat. This week could be a turning point for one team, but an early funeral for the other. Let’s see who can capitalize on a golden opportunity to stay right in the thick of the playoff race and catapult them into teams no one wants to see you going forward.

 

Upset Watch of the Week: Marvin's Room (Jack) vs. KRAFT YAC & CHEESE (Drew)

  • We were incredibly, correct again last week with our upset watch of the week, as Johnny shocked the world by taking down his brother Andy, in a truly shocking Agudelo Bowl. This week we move on from family bonds, and head instead to a head-to-head matchup with the two who truly embody the terms "white dad" like no other in the WFL. While Marvin's Room is dealing with a couple of key injuries limiting their ceiling this week, KRAFT YAC & CHEESE are missing key players on bye, making this week a lot tougher on paper than it seems like it should be. Marvin's Room was even favored to start off the week, so if some backup contributors can hit their stride, the former Commissioner Mr. Bloss might be in for a rude awakening coming off a big victory last week.

 

Predictions: (Last Week’s results: 4-2 😌

16-8 overall)

 

#8 Fuhuluhtoogans (Eric) ✅ vs. #9 Hall of Fame Youtuber (Fabian)

#4 Rome wasn’t built in a day (Parker) vs. #3 fent folding (Andy) ✅

#7 Worse than WHL (Jeremias) vs. #5 The Bang Bros (Andres) ✅

#10 Marvin's Room (Jack) vs. #1 KRAFT YAC & CHEESE (Drew) ✅

#6 Wake and Baker Co. (Jonah) ✅ vs. #2 I ❤️ Ohio (Ale)

#12 Rico Suave (Johnny) ✅ vs. #11 Cumming… (Daniel)

 

Divisional Standings

(Divisional Record in parentheses)

 

Cummish Division

#1 KRAFT YAC & CHEESE (Drew): 3-1 (1-1)

#3 Baptist Hospital (Andy): 3-1 (2-0)

#11 Cumming… (Daniel): 1-3 (0-2)

 

33176+ Division

#5 The Bang Bros (Andres): 2-2 (1-1)

#6 Wake and Baker Co. (Jonah): 2-2 (1-1)

#10 Marvin's Room (Jack): 1-3 (1-1)

 

sybau Division

#2 I ❤️ Ohio (Alejandro): 3-1 (2-0)

#8 Fuhuluhtoogans (Eric): 2-2 (0-1)

#9 Hall of Fame Youtuber (Fabian): 2-2 (0-1)

 

Trade2Trade Division

#4 Rome wasn’t built in a day (Parker): 2-2 (2-0)

#7 Worse than WHL (Jeremias): 2-2 (1-1)

#12 Rico Suave (Johnny): 1-3 (0-2)

 

 

A big shoutout to our sponsors Tough Cookie Inc. and WussiesGPT for helping the Donut section & Trade to Trade be what they are today!

 

If you or someone you know would like to be a sponsor for WFL Weekly, let us know and we’ll give you some options on where you can showcase your brand, company, or organization!

 

Additionally, if you have your own ideas for columns, one offs, or weekly installments, speak to Chief Editor Jack Reid for more information!

 

The only good luck that we here at WFL Weekly wish you, is good luck with injuries. Everything else is up to the higher powers.

 

*Note from the Editor*: Big thank you to Andy & Drew on the WFL Weekly Website team, you guys rock.