WFL WEEKLY 5 - Week 14: One Last Chance
It’s finally here. Week 14 can only mean one thing: The WFL’s most exciting week of the season is back. 2 Playoff spots are up for grabs, seeding can be completely shuffled, and if previous seasons are any indication, we are in for a high blood pressure Sunday & Monday night. Who will rise to the occasion and carve their name into the next level, giving them a chance at the crown? Who will break down and falter at the final hurdle? With the state of the WFL perhaps hinging on the outcomes of this week, what do the fantasy football gods have in store for our brave heroes? There’s only one way to find out.
Without further ado, let’s rock n roll
Biggest Winner:
Cumming… (Daniel) - It was a very good week to be a Daniel fan to say the least! Two major things of note for Mr. Daniel: #1 He got engaged! Congratulations to you and Whitney from all of us at WFL Weekly, our entire staff expects invitations to the wedding. #2 And in more important news, Cumming… had a dominant victory last week! (obviously kidding) But a great couple days nonetheless! Hopefully the good vibes continue for you and your squad going forward :) Positive momentum into the Toilet Bowl 😎
Other Winners:
On the Cock (Parker) - And just like that, despite the road being a lot rockier than expected, On the Cock & Parker are essentially locked into a playoff spot. Their victory over Rico Suave and their massive Points For total all but confirm we will be seeing Parker get his shot at making a run at the crown. With an elite RB trio, and an MVP contending QB leading the way, this is looking to be a scary team come playoff time. Up next is a measuring stick game against the league leading KRAFT YAC & CHEESE in what could be an early playoff preview 👀
Marvin’s Room (Jack) - Another week, another win by the skin of their teeth. Marvin’s Room have found a way to win by slimmer and slimmer margins each week, and this one was perhaps their greatest trick yet, as they escaped the historically lethal Hall of Fame Youtuber by a mere 0.44 point differential. Jaxon Dart returned, and while he didn’t provide Wan'Dale Robinson with the 30 point game that Jameis did, he certainly peppered him with targets. Every one of them was necessary to claim victory. Losing Marvin Harrison (again) to injury hurts, but the massive victory assures that should Marvin’s Room win beat Shitter Inc. this week, they will be in the playoffs. It should be a tough test. Can the joker get away one more time?
Biggest Loser:
Rico Suave (Johnny) - One had to think Rico Suave had a legitimate chance to be fighting for a playoff spot this week, especially going into Sunday Night Football. And then Zach Ertz turned back the clock and rediscovered his prime form, Bo Nix was pedestrian, Drake Maye did Drake Maye things, and Tyrone Tracy bonked his head. And so, the math tells you that Johnny’s squad is basically mathematically eliminated from playoff contention. It’s been a good year for his team and they’ve fought tooth and nail till the end, but it ended up being just not enough to earn what would’ve been a massive playoff berth. Still, Rico Suave has the chance to eliminate a division rival from contention for good, as they take on Worse than WBA in search of their first division win on the season.
Other Losers:
Shitter Inc. (Eric) - Shitter Inc. is not technically eliminated from the playoffs just yet, but they would sure need a LOT to go right in order to get in. Losing to Wake and Baker Co. last week spelled the beginning of the end, as a low-scoring effort across the board doomed Eric and company. Can this WR core find anything? They’ll need to find it, and a lot of it, if they want to pull off the impossible. They’ve certainly done it before!
Hall of Fame Youtuber (Fabian) - A brutal loss by less than a point is not something any team wants to hear, and especially not in Fabian’s case. His matchup with Marvin’s Room came down to the very last moments of Monday Night Football, and in the end his squad just couldn’t hang on
Donuts! (Sponsored by Tough Cookie Inc.):
A successful Thanksgiving sale has led to some December doldrums, but we’re not quite done yet at the WFL Bakery. In what was a slow week on the donut front, at least we’ve got one good customer who was more than generous with his donut orders this week.
🍩 Zay Flowers (The Bang Bros) - The only Flowers that Andres and The Bang Bros are receiving, are those for their fantasy funeral this year.
🍩 Amon-Ra St. Brown (The Bang Bros) - But wait, there’s more! Amon-Ra left his game with an early injury and earned the Bang Bros a 2nd donut on the week. Can’t expect much more from MAGA St. Clown.
Ale’s Trade to Trade Analysis:
*Powered by WussiesGPT*
*Closed for Winter*
The WFL Hierarchy:
*Proudly sponsored by Tough Cookie Inc. & written by Drew*
*Under Construction this week*
The Playoff Picture in 4K:
As we reach the pinnacle of the regular season, it’s time once again to see just who needs what to make their playoff dreams come true. So here’s a totally professional, well thought out, and not at all rushed playoff picture for everyone :D
#1 KRAFT YAC & CHEESE (Drew)**
Clinches #1 Overall Seed with:
WIN
Wake and Baker Co. LOSS
Outscore Wake & Baker Co. by 97.98
#2 Wake and Baker Co. (Jonah)**
Clinches #1 Overall Seed with:
WIN + KRAFT YAC & CHEESE LOSS
Clinches 1st Round Bye with:
WIN
LOSS + I ❤️ Ohio LOSS
I ❤️ Ohio doesn’t make up 188.88 point gap
#3 I ❤️ Ohio (Ale)*
Clinches 1st Round Bye with:
WIN + Wake and Baker Co. LOSS + outscore Wake and Baker Co. by 188.88
Clinches #3 Seed with:
WIN
On the Cock LOSS + Marvin’s Room LOSS
On the Cock LOSS + Marvin’s Room WIN + Outscore Marvin’s Room by -43.88
Clinches #4 Seed with:
LOSS + On the Cock WIN
LOSS + On the Cock Loss + Marvin’s Room WIN + Marvin’s Room makes up 43.88 point gap
Clinches #5 Seed with:
LOSS + On the Cock WIN + Marvin’s Room WIN + Marvin’s Room makes up 43.88 point gap
#4 On the Cock (Parker)*
Clinches #3 Seed with:
WIN + I ❤️ Ohio LOSS
Clinches #4 Seed with:
WIN + I ❤️ Ohio WIN
LOSS + Marvin’s Room LOSS
Clinches #5 Seed with:
LOSS + Marvin’s Room WIN
#5 Marvin’s Room (Jack)
Clinches #3 Seed with:
WIN + On the Cock LOSS + I ❤️ Ohio LOSS + Outscore I ❤️ Ohio by 43.88
Clinches #4 Seed with:
WIN + I ❤️ Ohio WIN + On the Cock LOSS
WIN + I ❤️ Ohio LOSS + Outscore I ❤️ Ohio by 43.88 + On the Cock WIN
Clinches # 5 Seed with:
WIN + I ❤️ Ohio WIN + On the Cock WIN
WIN + On the Cock WIN + I ❤️ Ohio LOSS + NOT out scoring I ❤️ Ohio by 43.88
Clinches Playoff Appearance with:
WIN
Wabi Sabi LOSS
Hall of Fame Youtuber LOSS
Outscore Wabi Sabi by 25.8
Outscore Hall of Fame Youtuber by 2.66
#6 Wabi Sabi (Andy)
Clinches #5 Seed with:
WIN + Marvin’s Room LOSS + Outscore Marvin’s Room by -25.8 + Outscore Hall of Fame Youtuber by -23.14
Clinches Playoff Appearance with:
WIN + Hall of Fame Youtuber LOSS
WIN + Marvin’s Room LOSS + Outscore Marvin’s Room by -25.8
LOSS + Hall of Fame Youtuber LOSS + Worse than WBA LOSS OR Outscore Worse than WBA by 32 + Outscore Shitter Inc. by -53.76
#7 Hall of Fame Youtuber (Fab)
Clinch #5 Seed with:
WIN + Wabi Sabi LOSS + Marvin’s Room LOSS + Outscore Marvin’s Room by -2.66
Clinch Playoff Appearance with:
WIN + Wabi Sabi LOSS
WIN + Marvin’s Room LOSS + Outscore Marvin’s Room by -2.66
WIN + Wabi Sabi WIN + Outscore Wabi Sabi by 23.14
LOSS + Wabi Sabi LOSS + Outscore Wabi Sabi by 23.14 + Worse than WBA LOSS + Outscore Shitter Inc. by -30.62
#8 Worse than WBA (Jere)
Clinch Playoff Appearance with:
WIN + Wabi Sabi LOSS + Hall of Fame Youtuber LOSS + Maintain point lead over both
#9 Shitter Inc. (Eric)
Clinch Playoff Appearance with:
WIN + Wabi Sabi LOSS + Hall of Fame Youtuber LOSS + Worse than WBA LOSS + Outscore Wabi Sabi by 53.76 + Outscore Hall of Fame Youtuber by 30.62
#10 Rico Suave (Johnny)
ELIMINATED
#11 The Bang Bros (Andres)
ELIMINATED
#12 Cumming… (Daniel)
ELIMINATED
Papa’s Picks:
WFL Weekly Game of the Week: Hall of Fame Youtuber (Fabian) vs. I ❤️ Ohio (Ale)
A tale as old as time. Two rivals forever linked since they entered the WFL. One trying to return to a former glory that he has fallen just short of reaching time and time again. Another looking to once again prevent absolute destruction and get out alive. I am of course talking about Hall of Fane Youtuber & I ❤️ Ohio. Fabian & Ale. A fallen tyrant and the resistance who has lost so many in order to keep him at bay. This week we get to write another chapter in the storied rivalry between these two teams that know each other all too well. The only way to capture the feelings of the matchup would be to speak to the competitors of the matchup themselves.
Asking Ale about the bout, he told us "A matchup against Fabian is one I certainly circled on my yearly schedule for the WFL. It’s been a storied rivalry for a long time. One of luck, one of Brock Purdy and the 49ers, and one where I woke up to tostada cubana and café con leche with my would-be championship opponent. This year though; feels different. My team certainly doesn’t have the same firepower, and while deleting Fabian’s playoff hopes on are on the top of my mind, I’m mainly focusing on keeping my team safe from injuries. I’m worried about the manager who seemed to quit the WFL, keeping Corum on his roster. All things considered, I’m in a great place with an opportunity to win the Sybau Division Title. To boot; I get to knock Fabian out of yoffs? I feel pretty good. Won the trade."
When we asked Fabian his thoughts on the matchup, he told us "If we’re being frank, we are just hoping for the best. This team can’t afford any byes at this time, and we have 2. It feels like this time it might be Alejandro’s game to lose".
Once again the stakes are high. Can Ale work his magic and once again deny Fabian a shot at regaining the throne? Or will Fabian take that step towards making another run towards a cruel destiny? Let’s find out.
Upset Watch of the Week: Marvin’s Room (Jack) vs. Shitter Inc. (Eric)
This matchup has the makings of a spooky finish. Marvin’s Room produced a massive result with a nail-biter victory last week against Hall of Fame Youtuber to improve their playoff chances massively, but they still are in a must-win situation. The return, and subsequent exit of Marvin Harrison Jr., Trey Benson simply not being ready to play, plus last week’s heroes Jaxon Dart & Wan'Dale Robinson being on bye, have left Jack’s squad in a rough position. Shitter Inc. on the other hand were eliminated from playoff contention last week with a loss to Wake and Baker Co., but still boast a more than capable roster. Dak Prescott has been lights out, and the RB core 4 of Ashton Jeanty, Breece Hall, Kareem Hunt, and David Montgomery have been solid. Should Eric start to get some production out of WRs not named Khalil Shakir, this could very well be a big scoring week for Shitter Inc. Back in Week 3, Eric’s squad completely dominated in a 54 point victory, what does fate have in store this go around?
Predictions: (Last Week’s results: 1-5 
48-30 overall
#8 Worse than WBA (Jere) vs. #10 Rico Suave (Johnny) ✅
#2 Wake and Baker Co. (Jonah) ✅ vs. #11 The Bang Bros (Andres)
#12 Cumming… (Daniel) vs. #6 Wabi Sabi (Andy) ✅
#5 Marvin’s Room (Jack) vs. #9 Shitter Inc. (Eric) ✅
#1 KRAFT YAC & CHEESE (Drew) vs. #4 On the Cock (Parker) ✅
#7 Hall of Fame Youtuber (Fab) vs. #3 I ❤️ Ohio (Ale) ✅
Divisional Standings
(Divisional Record in parentheses)
Cummish Division
#1 KRAFT YAC & CHEESE (Drew): 11-2 (3-1)
#6 Wabi Sabi (Andy): 6-7 (2-1)
#12 Cumming… (Daniel): 3-10 (0-3)
33176+ Division
#2 Wake and Baker Co. (Jonah): 10-3 (1-1)
#5 Marvin's Room (Jack): 7-6 (2-1)
#11 The Bang Bros (Andres): 4-9 (1-2)
sybau Division
#3 I ❤️ Ohio (Alejandro): 9-4 (3-0)
#7 Hall of Fame Youtuber (Fabian): 6-7 (0-2)
#9 Shitter Inc. (Eric): 5-8 (1-2)
Trade2Trade Division
#4 On the Cock (Parker): 7-6 (4-0)
#8 Forever Worse than WHL (Jeremias): 5-8 (1-2)
#10 Rico Suave (Johnny): 5-8 (0-3)
A big shoutout to our sponsors Tough Cookie Inc. and WussiesGPT for helping the Donut section & Trade to Trade be what they are today, and to Drew for his power rankings!
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The only good luck that we here at WFL Weekly wish you, is good luck with injuries. Everything else is up to the higher powers.
*Note from the Editor*: Big thank you to Andy & Drew on the WFL Weekly Website team, you guys rock.